it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
