i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
