Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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