my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
