how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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