so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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