I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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