And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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