How'd it feel making her break her religion?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
