i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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