called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
