don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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