Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
