i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
