State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Success! We fucked roommates!
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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