I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Randomize