It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
