you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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