Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
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