North Korea, Best Korea!
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
