i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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