you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
