Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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