I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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