my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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