Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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