I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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