Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
