Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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