so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
