I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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