Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize