so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Someone came in the potted fern
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
