Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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