i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize