i just wanna soil my oats bro
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
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