Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Randomize
