I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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