If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
