WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
