i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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