Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
