It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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