I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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