I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
