It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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