I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
