so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
