Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
