So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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